Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Me In a Nutshell


I just recently updated my LDSsingles profile and thought I would share it with readers...ENJOY!

"I am outgoing, fun, spontaneous, and happy! I love anything to do with the outdoors; camping, hiking, boating, ANYTHING! I love dogs, kids, cooking, karaoke, spending time with family and friends, reading, movies, lazy days, gardening, going for long drives, and long walks on the beach. I served a mission in the Canada Vancouver mission and it was the best thing I ever did! I don't know how I could be a wife and a mother without that! 

I firmly believe in long courtships and short engagements. I think people who get married super quick are crazy! I believe that, like any good thing in life, relationships take hard work. Open, honest, and sincere communication and unconditional forgiveness are key! No two people are 100% compatible, but as long as those two people are willing to work for eternity than anything is possible. 

I want someone who is strong and firm in the Gospel. Someone who is a worthy priesthood holder. Someone who will do what the General Authorities have been telling him in Priesthood session and ask me on a legitimate date. Someone who can take me to the temple. Someone who loves kids and will be the kind of Father that me and my children can rely on. I don't care about your past, even if you've been married before or already have kids! The more the merrier!

There's a lot I can handle. I am a strong girl with a good work ethic.  If you aren't willing to work hard then I'm not the girl for you.  I did mention I like lazy-days...but only on a very rare occasion.  Not many things are deal breakers for me.  You like video game? Cool.  As long as there's not problem with them.  Hunting? Ok.  Again.  As long as there's no problems with juggling priorities.  The one deal breaker I have is pornography.  I won't do it.  "Being a guy" is no excuse.  I'm expected to be worthy 100% of the time, I expect the same.  

Elder Holland said: "In this matter of counterfeit intimacy and deceptive gratification, I express particular caution to the men who hear this message. I have heard all my life that it is the young woman who has to assume the responsibility for controlling the limits of intimacy in courtship because a young man cannot. What an unacceptable response to such a serious issue! What kind of man is he, what priesthood or power or strength or self-control does this man have that lets him develop in society, grow to the age of mature accountability, perhaps even pursue a university education and prepare to affect the future of colleagues and kingdoms and the course of the world, but yet does not have the mental capacity or the moral will to say, "I will not do that thing"? No, this sorry drugstore psychology would have us say, "He just can't help himself. His glands have complete control over his life--his mind, his will, his entire future."

"To say that a young woman in such a relationship has to bear her responsibility and that of the young man's too is the least fair assertion I can imagine. In most instances if there is sexual transgression, I lay the burden squarely on the shoulders of the young man--for our purposes probably a priesthood bearer--and that's where I believe God intended responsibility to be. In saying that I do not excuse young women who exercise no restraint and have not the character or conviction to demand intimacy only in its rightful role. I have had enough experience in Church callings to know that women as well as men can be predatory. But I refuse to buy some young man's feigned innocence who wants to sin and call it psychology."

Hard words to read, I know.  But it makes my heart heavy. Nothing makes me want to crawl in a hole and cry till I'm dry than the thought that something so evil as pornography is what is keeping men from being worthy.  Something so degrading, demoralizing, and dehumanizing as that.  It makes me feel like I'll never be "good enough," when in reality I AM WORTH THE FIGHT!

Yes, I want to be married and have a family more than life itself. But I would rather remain single my whole life than to risk becoming an object and having a broken family.  

Don't like my straightforwardness?  Not my problem.  Welcome to the 21st century."

Friday, October 5, 2012

Words of Wisdom...from a dear friend.

Dear Readers, my friend Nicole just blogged something I would like to share with you...

Read it.

Follow it. 

Love it. 

Thank Nicole!

Passive Rejection: What's Wrong with It & Why It Needs to Stop

Monday, October 1, 2012

It all started with the butter stain on my pants...

Monday. October 1, 2012.

It started like a regular day. Had a hard time getting out of bed, nothing unusual. I got ready for work, grabbed breakfast, and I thought "Lauri is comin back to work today, it's gonna be a good day." (Lauri is my coworker who had a baby back in August.)

I got in the car and just happened to look at my scrubs.

There was that butter stain I had totally forgotten about...right on my right thigh.

I should've known then it was going to be a rough day. Fortunately I had an extra pair in my car to change into.

I got to work a couple minutes late, nothing unusual about that. Walked in and...no Lauri. Her baby had been sick over the weekend and she had Dr.'s appointments for him today. "That's ok," I thought, "we'll make it."

Then it happened.

The floor was busy.

The lab was busy.

I swear I called 10 Dr.'s offices today for lab orders, forcing patients to wait extra long to get their blood drawn. I got blamed, yelled at, and had some pretty mean things said to me. We were short one person which meant there was one person to run the front office and draw outpatients, one person to run specimen processing, and one person to draw inpatients on the floor. I was having to poke patients more than once cause I was just not on my game today. I was so frustrated. It was one thing after another.

To top it all off, this volunteer kept bugging me during a draw and I had had it!!!

It finally calmed down enough for me to find my sanity...at 4:50 pm (I'm off at 5:30.)

No worries, I grabbed a milkshake on my way home. And even then the girl didn't speak up when she told me the total so I looked monumentally stupid when I gave her 8 cents short. Gah!

That's alright. It's all better.

I should've known it was gonna be that kind of day when I saw the butter stain on my pants.

It was a bad case of the Mondays.

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Identity

I love weekends.

I usually spend them in Pleasant Grove with my friend Brittany.

Lets be honest, when you live at home with Mom and Dad, weekends aren't super exciting. Although I love them dearly.

This weekend we had some pretty exciting plans.

I just so happened to be the weekend of the Cirque Lodge Alumni Reunion.

I was really apprehensive about going but it was important to Brittany, so tag along I would.

Friday started out with a dinner in the auditorium/ropes course room. Alright food. Good company. Pretty room. Then, we moved into a program where a few people spoke: the guy over the horses, Dave, Mr. Losee (Mrs. Losee sang a song), Gary, who cries a lot, and one of the alumni. A. Maz. ING! Afterward we circled up, all 200+ of us, just like in an AA meeting, where they had this gong thing (I seriously CANNOT remember the real name) where there was one gong for every former resident who had passed away. I was a blubbering fool. I kept thinking of everyone I have known affected by addiction, therefore affecting me.

My brother Cameron.

My cousin Garrett.

My cousin Craig.

The patient who came into Jordan Valley this week in full arrest because of an overdose who passed away.

And numerous friends and patients who come to the lab regularly for blood work.

People I know. And I just kept thinking how each one of them could be a gong that night.

The cute old man next to me in the circle up, a recovering alcoholic and former resident, held my hand tight and later thanked me for my show of emotion telling me how grateful he was for it and how refreshing it was. He was so nice and sweet.

Saturday there was a bonfire up at Aspen Grove up by Sundance where there was a meeting where people shared different experiences around the fire. As I sat and listened to them all, I noticed something.

About their identity.

They always identified by who they ARE. Not were. Not could be. Not NOT.

ARE.

Hi, my name is Erin, and I am a daughter of God. I'm imperfect. I'm afraid. But I trust, like all these people who have gone through way more than I ever will, that my higher power, my Heavenly Father, knows the bigger picture and has a plan for me.

I am going to be alright.

Thank you Cirque, Alumni, and Brittany for an AMAZING weekend!!!!!